Will banning Delilah help tackle domestic violence?

The Welsh Rugby Union has banned the Tom Jones song Delilah from the Millenium Stadium in Cardiff. It is a song about domestic violence and murder but is not the only song which deals with difficult subjects.

Will the Welsh National Opera still perform Carmen? This is a brilliant opera and one of the most popular, but the story is of a man who was seduced by Carmen, she then dumped him for a charismatic matador, so he stalked her and murdered her. It makes Delilha seem like a nursery rhyme.

The classic musical, West Side Story, based on Romeo and Juliet tells of murder and suicide in New York Gangs. Before I saw the film in the 1960s I had wrongly imagined that men dancing was effeminate. These lads were tough and the dancing made them appear even stronger. Suddenly a teenage boy had a role model in a dancer. It would not have worked in a gentler musical such as Cliff Richard’s Summer Holiday.

In the 1960s was the song 'Young Girl' by Gary Puckett and the Union Gap. It is a great song but, if you listen to the lyrics, it is about a man trying to avoid being seduced by an under-age girl.

Band of Gold by Freda Payne is one of the most popular songs in weddings, but it is about a woman who has been stood up at the altar. “Now that you’re gone, all that’s left is a band of gold”, not great from a wedding.

'Every breath you take', by The Police and written by Sting could be seen as stalking. “Every move you make, every bond you break, every step you take, I’ll be watching you”. It is an iconic song but how would a woman feel if these words came from an ex-boyfriend?

Even the story Beauty and the Beast can be seen a Stockholm Syndrome when a victim of kidnapping or a hostage end up falling in love with their captor.

As a GP and working with the police I have seen the results of domestic violence, child abuse and stalking. All are horrendous and leave victims with major emotional scars for life.

Over the years different books and songs shock in different ways. I have a reprint of 'Reading without tears', a Victorian book used to teach young children to read. It is deeply religious but some of the stories for young children to read might not be approved by OFSTED.

In one story a young girl is always talking about God and Jesus. I have nothing against her religious views, but she does sound a bit of a prig. A 'naughty boy' takes his father’s gun and shoots her dead, but it is all right because she goes straight to heaven. I am not sure that even the most religious people would want their little girl to read this story. It never happened in Janet and John.

In another story a child who was always talking about God and Jesus stepped under a horse drawn omnibus and was killed but, again, this is fine because her last word was 'Jesus'. If I stepped under a bus my last word might be 'Jesus' but any other words I said at the same time might send me the other way.

Singing at sports events helps the atmosphere and I have no doubt that the Welsh fans will sing Delilha with or without the approval of the Welsh Rugby Union. It is difficult to stop 70,000 enthusiastic Welsh people singing. I do not believe that they all listen to the words, go home and beat up their partners. Domestic violence is evil, but the roots are far more complicated. We cannot solve the problem by banning a classic song.