Dr Peter Moore: Don't worry, you won't need counselling by reading this column

I imagine that Holly Willoughby’s This morning audience have suffered worse trauma than a fellow presenter leaving the show although, as they are watching daytime TV, we can never be sure. My parents’ generation lived through the war and today there is a horrific war in Ukraine and so there are worse things in the world than Phillip Scofield being gay and then lying.

I could ask you to 'bring me up to speed' and ask, 'how are things working for you?'. Any answer is followed by 'what do you think that means?' or just 'umm'.

Would supportive psychotherapy improve your ego function? If you cannot understand all these jargon expressions, don’t worry, neither can I. It does not mean you need therapy to cope with your confusion.

I have had some training in counselling. I even used some of the techniques in the surgery although it was a challenge to squeeze them into ten minutes.

The first technique is to avoid a leading question. Journalists try the same technique although it can appear rather crass. After a personal disaster when friends and family have been killed the journalist should not ask, 'So, how do you feel?' They might get an answer they cannot print.

I am not sure whether any therapist or psychiatrist ever really asks their patients or clients to lie on a couch, but it is important not to sit on a huge chair behind an enormous desk. Sitting alongside the patient (sorry client) at eye level in an open position will help.

Unfortunately, I was not impressed by Dr Bear when he saw Noddy in one of Enid Blyton’s books. He stood over him and said, 'you must not worry'. I’m sorry Dr Bear but that will not work. Telling anyone not to worry or to snap out of it will make them feel worse. They know they shouldn’t worry but someone with chickenpox knows they should not have spots but they cannot wish them away.

Equally saying 'If I were you' is insulting. I am not you and, if I was in the same position, my handling of the situation may well be totally different.

The aim is to help the client to understand their situation and help them work out their own solutions. Sometimes it is necessary to help someone understand that there is no simple solution. Life can be tough and some emotions are normal. Anyone who is feeling low after a bereavement or other personal tragedy is not ill but normal.

And therapy or counselling is not always comfortable. Sometime a gentle challenge may be needed. 'On the one hand you’re saying X and then arguing Y. Do you think there might be an inconsistency here?' It is even possible to reflect back how the client makes the therapist feel. “You come over as a bit aggressive. Do you think that others may see you in this way?”

In general practice it is possible to overdo the psychotherapy. One friend of mine was very keen to analyse every patient. His partner told me that a patient came to see him and said, “I’ve got a really sore throat. It is painful. There was nothing wrong with my childhood and my sex life is fine. Please just look at my throat.”

Sometimes just talking a problem through to someone who will listen and not give advice is enough. Sometimes the doctor not the prescription is the drug which helps.

Some older GPs did not always understand the subtle nuances of counselling. I once saw in some notes the line 'counselled severely'. He had clearly learnt the word counselled but did not understand its meaning.

For anyone too traumatised by my column, help is available.