BoJo, mice and boobs... what a week!

Prime Minister Boris Johnson during a briefing in Downing Street on coronavirus

Prime Minister Boris Johnson during a briefing in Downing Street on coronavirus - Credit: PA

Another week another article, and the weeks sure are flying by. We’ve had every season of weather this week too.

I think I must have been the only person not to have watched BoJo’s announcement, so I am now the most confused Brit walking.

I really am lost as to what we can and can’t do, it’s a good job I’m not in charge of organising anything! Those of you who are, I feel for you.

The most exciting thing that’s happened in our house this week is a mouse that has set up home in the bass speaker and my daughter having a few friends over for her upcoming birthday.

The said mouse appears to be very comfortable in the speaking and is driving the cats mad as they can’t see him, but somehow know it’s in here.

I have tried to coax the little rodent out with food but the little might is too quick for me and manages to outwit me, every time.

I am not best pleased at the speaker becoming Mickey mouse’s house or the fact that it is now probably broken and full of droppings - marvellous...

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Talking of my daughter, this week she has won the award for funniest and most embarrassing comment in class.

You know it can only mean something bad has happened when the teacher spots you walking toward the classroom, rushes inside to grab his mask, then comes toward you with hesitation and a chuckle.

I cover my face knowing imminent shame is about to be bestowed upon me, and I am not disappointed as the teacher begins the tale.

“Today we were learning about change, changing bodies to be exact.”

Oh, dearest lord please just take me now.

“We’d been talking about nipples and boobs, when your daughter raised her hand.” (I am now wishing for a bolt of lightning to strike me down as I am not sure I can cope with what is coming).

“Well, I have to watch my mum put her bra on every morning, and that’s a delight – NOT!”

Boom, there it is total humiliation.

Guess who’s not getting birthday present now...